I used to like everything
perfectly planned and in order, but I have had to learn to relax--
six children and a "perfect" house just don't go together. I'll admit
I still have days I'd like to have my own apartment just so I could
have just one place kept perfectly neat! I have to be flexible because
with so many young children, things often get put on hold. We do have
a good basic routine, which helps, but I have to allow time for interruptions.
I also make lists and then don't get upset if I don't get everything
done. A new day begins tomorrow!
I have to remind myself
that even though it may seem like I didn't accomplish much some days,
I'm actually doing the most important work in the world--helping to
mold and shape precious human lives with the Lord's help. What an
awesome responsibility. We can provide a secure, loving environment
for them in the midst of all the chaos in the world! We can lead them
to Jesus, teach them His ways and help prepare them for the unique
ministry that He has for each one of them.
Sometimes too,
we must think of all the things that could have happened that day,
but didn't! The children didn't throw a temper tantrum and talk back
because we have been faithful to be consistent and train them in the
ways of the Lord. (Not that they aren't still "in training" in some
areas--we are, too!) They didn't experience rejection because we have
demonstrated our unconditional love for them. They didn't grow hungry
because we fed them peanut butter sandwiches and fruit! They were
sheltered from many negative circumstances--they were safe in our
care. They heard about Jesus from our lips and saw Him in our lives
today, they joined in with singing songs to Him.
If the floor didn't get mopped, and
the clothes are filling all eight baskets in the laundry room, what
difference does it make? Eventually those things will get done, but
in the meantime, our children have a mother who truly loves and cares
for them, even during the less than glorious times!
Some days being a godly mother
is all one can accomplish--and it is a BIG accomplishment. After all,
I don't plan to take my baskets of laundry and the kitchen floor with
me when Jesus returns--I do plan to take my family! And there won't
be any quizzes for my 9 year old to make sure she knows her multiplication
tables before she enters Heaven. We've got to keep things in perspective.
Academics are important, but there are other things more important--and
if we keep the right perspective, the Lord will bless our homeschooling,
our mothering, and our family!
Do you ever look back upon
your day and think, "What did I really accomplish?" Every week I hear
from frustrated mothers who feel they don't have enough hours in the
day to do all that's needed. Most of
them have young children and when someone
asks them, "What did you do today?",they look back and have a hard
time producing tangible evidence of a full day's work! "Hmmm...I cleaned
up the house some but it's messy again. The dishes were done, but
we used them again. I spent time cooking dinner but we ate it in fifteen
minutes. We homeschooled---children, tell your father what you learned
today!" (Young children give their mom a blank look, then sidle up
next to her and whisper, "What? Tell me again!") We've all probably
had days like this! One of the busiest
seasons of life is when all
the children are young --on the other hand, when they are young, you
can afford to be more relaxed about their homeschooling and cover
the necessary work in just a few hours a week--while spending more
time working on attitudes, obedience, sibling relationships, teamwork,
talking and learning about the Lord, enjoying hugs and stories, learning
about nature and why things work the way they do, counting spoons
and subtracting and dividing cookies--and of course, answering lots
of questions! Are you viewing taking care of all the children's needs,
changing diapers, answering questions, wiping tears, teaching obedience,
mopping up spilled milk, etc., as "interruptions"?
They're not,
they are some of the MAIN occupations of a mom with young children!
So often during these years, our efforts seem to have no tangible
results at the end of the day, but just because we can't always SEE
what's been done, doesn't mean nothing has been accomplished. We are
shaping young lives, and allowing the Lord to shape ours in the process
as we yield to Him each day. We are ministering to the Lord as we
minister to our family! We do need to be on guard against time-wasters--
the telephone, television, too many outside activities, letting things
go with the children and not taking time to train and correct them
in a Christlike manner. (Otherwise, countless minutes are wasted by
having
to repeat ourselves every time we tell the children to do something!)
I
no longer have very young children but I'd like to share something
I wrote years ago when I had a nursing baby, an active 2 year old
and homeschooled four older children. [Just so no one thinks I can't
remember what it was like in those days!]
A Wasted Day? (part I
and part II by Tamara Eaton
[Please note--this was written
years ago and I can now report that the nine year old is
now a teenager
and knows her multiplication tables well!]
Attempting
to be "good stewards" of their time, some mothers crowd many activities
into each day. Therefore, they end up pressuring themselves in ways
God never intended! We need time to train our children and enjoy them--time
to rest and meditate upon God's Word and allow Him to speak. Time
to act in response to circumstances of daily life instead of reacting
to the swirling events that surround us. Doing all things without
murmurings and disputings--that we might shine as lights, holding
forth the word of life--so we can say with Paul, that we will not
have laboured in vain. (Colossians 3)
If
this has been a struggle for you recently, why not ask the Lord to
give you His perspective, and allow Him to reveal any areas that need
changing? He is so patient and longsuffering with us, and the conviction
of the Holy Spirit is always tempered with encouragement that we can
repent, receive forgiveness and a clean slate. He delights in our
dependence upon Him and freely bestows all the grace we need!
